World…Hold on!

A regular guy, who studies at the faculty of engineering. He’s a student in the civil engineering department, or was it communication? I don’t know. It’s his second year, or the third…doesn’t matter. He had already spent enough time to feel suppressed by the lifestyle. The tight schedule, the ongoing endless pursuit for out-dated information. knowing he’d never use it when he’s a graduate, he doesn’t give it much attention, he doesn’t need to fully understand or grasp this knowledge. He’s become that practical, that all of these courses are marks he needs to score. Just to please those Professors, or his parents. Those 1500 marks have become his only worry. GOTTA CATCH’EM ALL!

Being convinced that this is the only key to becoming an engineer, having a dignified job, working in a prestigious firm, earning lots of money. He was fed these unguaranteed dreams that he’d become a predator, living on his own benefit even at the cost of other’s misery.

Till someday he realized that…he doesn’t want to do it anymore. He may have got a wake up call by losing someone that’s dear to him, a family member, a close friend in the country’s flaming fray…or maybe a severe heart-break by his so-called soulmate.

Since then, he’s been looking too small of himself. His life has been corrupted and misshaped on many aspects. He feels he’s got nothing left so pure he can hold on to. He lost his self-respect, he lost the love he devoted himself to, his friends seem to him no more than a bunch of selfish mongrels hunting for flesh, his family isn’t how he wishes it should be that he doesn’t love them as much…

He wants out…out and away…from all of this, he wishes he’d be able to find a fresh new clean start. He seeks purification, he seeks something he can dedicate himself to, something meaningful, he gets optimistic, embracing things that’s not likely for people like him to embrace. He does good, lots of good. To himself, to those close, to those he doesn’t know, to those whom he thinks to deserve better, deeply believing it will change those whom he’s not satisfied with.

But it keeps on crumbling! The friends, the family, the country, the world! All of them keep mocking him, keep crushing his newly formed indestructible faith. None of them are improving, hell they’re even getting worse!

He turns back to self suspicion, what could he have done wrong?

He tried every possible way he could think of, to improve, to elevate, to rise above!

But he fails again, and his optimistic far-sight was getting narrow, and dark, and limited…

He feels there’s no way out. He wishes he could tell the ones who are mislead and harnessed into consuming lifestyles, preset templates of life, a paved way with no turns, no u-turns. He wishes he could find someone to tell him there’s still more to look forward to. But he’s already given up, his spirit crumbled, his mind was shut, his heart no more beats of life!

And one day, on a day like any other, after the first blow he takes, he falls of the ledge…to meet his maker…!

[A personal interpretation tied -with sorrow- to a true story!]

Posted on May 10, 2012, in Everything. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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